I’m a weird eccentric woman fish.

Lori Glenn is a collector – a designer – a thrifter. Yet, Lori is perhaps most well-known among polynesiacs for being the eccentric ZsaZsaRumWhore, the mystery dancer extraordinaire at Ohana Luau by the Lake.

Lori’s mystery bowl dances are legendary. When the Fraternal Order of Moai (FOM) holds an annual tiki weekender at Lake George each year, ZsaZsaRumWhore’s appearance is much anticipated. She’s secured a reputation for generating some of the highest single bids for FOM’s premiere charity event. How? Most dancers choose a traditional hula or exotica dance similar to the ones performed at the Mai Kai. Not Lori. Given her experience as an emcee for burlesque shows, she knows how to up the ante. ZsaZsaRumWhore’s first mystery bowl appearance literally brought home the bacon. Dressed as a pig with six quite voluptuous suckling tits, her mystery dance was an instant hit. Another year she wanted to up her appeal, so she went with bananas. In keeping with the motto for FOM, Lori knows how to have “fun with a purpose.”

Lori invited me to sit down and enjoy a honeysuckle daiquiri in her tropical escape. She adores tiki culture and the many polynesiacs that connect her to it. Her knotty pine tiki lounge is ample evidence. She has a Witco. She has tikis. She has black velvet paintings on the walls. Lori even has a photobook of family trips to Hawaii and a vintage photo of her Grandma kissing Don Ho. She loves all things eccentric.

“I have a black velvet of Old Gregg. Is it tiki? No. Not at all. It’s The Mighty Boosh. I love it because it’s eccentric and weird. I’m just like that. That’s me – I’m a weird eccentric woman fish.”

When I asked what tips she had for other polynesiacs, she offered her advice. “Keep collecting. Find the odd things that connect to your life. Should you worry if it’s everyone’s taste? No. Should you worry if it’s tiki? No. Does it work? Yes.”

Take a look at Lori’s oasis, and you’ll see for yourself.

Call me Ahab.

The process of creating Queegueg’s Coffin, my home tiki bar – my special island, is a never-ending process, as is the case with many other tiki enthusiasts.

This week I purchased a new wide-angle lens, so I thought it was time to update the images for my home bar, especially as I prepare to embark on my journey across the states to visit with other “passionfruit people.”

My most recent additions include home sewn (I made them) sails anchored with sisal ropes tied with nautical knots as a nod to the whaling ships that the harpooner Queequeg was on in Moby Dick. I’ve also added additional Hue lighting to the bar and tiki mug shelves that allows for constantly changing tropical sunset colors. I’ve added mirrored port holes and additional black velvet paintings. These are all along with my existing huge tiki from Tiki Rancher and my aqua neon “TOM” (old letters from a vintage motel sign) that Les had restored for me.The bar is not done by any means. Les has helped me brainstorm ideas for adding a coffin element that is artistic (not morbid since the iconic reference is one of saving one’s life in the book) and provides an equal reference to the tattoos that covered Queequeg’s body.

I hope to work on those when I return from the trip this summer.

Call me Ahab?